LOVE IS APPROACHABLE

In Paul’s great love hymn in 1 Cor. 13 it may not say in so many words that love is approachable, but it is inferred. If love looks for a way of being constructive, does not cherish inflated ideas of its own importance, and keeps no score of wrongs, as Phillips renders part of the apostle’s description, then love is approachable. Or if love is patient, kind, and endures all things, as the KJV has it, then love is approachable.

Being approachable is so eminently Christian that it is a virtue we should all covet. Jesus bore this virtue perfectly. We should make him our model and thus avoid those traits that turn people off. Jesus is the one person who could have prayed the prayer of the Pharisee in Lk. 18, “God, I thank you that I am not like other men,” but he didn’t pray it. As perfectly good as Jesus was he didn’t think of himself as good. He hardly thought of himself at all, so absorbed he was in the problems of others. He was approachable to children, to women, to the outcasts of society, even to despised lepers. He was never too busy for people. He always had time for them, however busy he was. The common people heard him gladly because they sensed the radiance of his openness. Jesus was even harborous to those who did him wrong. Being approachable! It is the one trait that makes for a beautiful life.

You will notice that I described Jesus as being harborous. It befits him, for he was a refuge or a harbor for those who sailed stormy seas. Tyndale’s 16th century translation rendered Rom. 12:13 (“Practice hospitality”) as “Be ye of an harborous disposition.” That one really grabs me. I recall the story of a blind girl who was taken to a Rose Garden party at the White House to help launch a fund-raising project. When the First Lady approached, she excitedly said, “Mother, am I smiling?” I feel that way about this great idea of being harborous. In the face of a troubled world pleading for warmth, acceptance, and understanding, I find myself asking, “Lord, am I approachable?” Oh, if we can but be “soul shelter” to some dreary soul! Small boats are in danger all about us. Are they willing to pull in to our harbor.

We must avoid those things that make us unapproachable, such as a judgmental, sectarian spirit. I recently heard a leading minister of our more “conservative” churches berate those who were promoting “the new hermeneutics” as hypocrites. He hardly made himself approachable to those he sought to correct. There are those, however, who can “speak the truth in love” with such force as to correct the unruly and yet maintain a forbearing spirit. I am persuaded that being approachable is partly a matter of faith.

Self-pride and self-righteousness also make us unapproachable. A person with an exaggerated sense of his own importance does not make for a welcome harbor. One who is full of self will not have listening ears or an open heart to someone who is hurting. If we are truly approachable we will not be selective as to who sails into our harbor. If we are open only to those we can use to promote our own interests, we are not only unapproachable but unauthentic as well. We are probably much closer to Jesus when we are with the rejects and misfits of society than when we are with “those who are somewhat.” We learn early on, even in school, to avoid those who are not accepted by the crowd. This is why when we draw closer to God we are more harborous to those who need us most.

Hardly anything promotes unity among believers as much as being approachable. When we have an aura about us that reads “Keep Out” or “Enter At Your Own Risk,” there is going to be little fellowship. But if one is easy to talk to and is willing to make herself vulnerable to others the sharing of a common life in Christ is possible. Vulnerability and approachability are stepping stones to “the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” The one who can sincerely confess “I goofed” and “I am sorry” (and perhaps even “I love you”) is prepared to be a peacemaker among divided brethren. But not so with the brother, however talented, who is never wrong about anything and who never changes his mind. The fellow who appears to be saying, “We Browns never stoop,” is a harbor none of us chooses to enter. This is why some kids can’t approach their own parents.

How approachable are you? Are you fortressed in by the pursuit of your own goals? Are you secluded in your own small world of selfish pride? Are you imprisoned in time frames of petty, shallow pursuits, with little time for anyone else?

These questions may be hard to answer. We need help from outside ourselves. Our answer is that we become more open, more approachable, more harborous the more we become like Jesus. We have our answer when we pause and hear him say, “Suffer the little children to come unto me, for of such is the kingdom of heaven.” The one who had time for children is the one who provides us “access” (Rom. 5:2)—What a beautiful word!—access to a God who otherwise “dwells in unapproachable light” (1 Tim. 6:16). Now that is being approachable!

Besides all this, life is more fun when we open ourselves to the world around us. We are happier when we are harborous. It is worth trying. You might start by paying more attention to little children in the neighborhood or at church. Bend down to a little one and tell he!” how pretty her dress is, or ask the little boy about his new cap. Learn to talk to kids, especially those that are ignored. Or peel off from the highway traffic and stop at a nursing home. Ask the attendant to select someone for you to visit, someone who has little or no visitors. During your visit think of yourself as a harbor, and that you are opening up your heart to this lonely, frightened soul. As you become more harborous you become more like Jesus Christ, and that makes life a joyous, exciting experience.—the Editor