PEOPLE
WITH PROBLEMS
(Rather
Than Problem People)
I
don’t want to be the kind of minister or editor who is isolated
from the “world out there” where one finds the blood and
gut issues of life. The preacher who insulates himself against the
wilderness of sin and trouble by hiding out in his office all day is
not likely to do any problem solving when he stands before the
people. The big evangelist who zooms into town a few days, holes up
in a hotel, conducts easy services at a fashionable church, dines
with the affluent, and leaves with their bounty in his pocket is
hardly in the class with those who are ministering at the raw edges
of our sick culture.
When
I sit down to my typewriter as a Christian journalist, one
ministering through the printed page to folk in many walks of life
and with myriad of problems, I want to do so as one who has learned
in the great drama of life to “weep with those that weep and
rejoice with those that rejoice.”
One
of the great shortcomings of the modern church is that its assemblies
offer so little to the troubled soul. People come hungry and they
leave hungry. They walk away bearing the burdens they brought with
them. Modern preaching does little problem solving. Even though the
apostle insists that all things in the assembly are to be for the
edification of the saints, there is often more that is discouraging
than encouraging. Religion should be a peaceful, joyous experience,
but as often as not it is burdensome and oppressive.
The
Bible tells us that there is a time to heal, but the gift of healing
is not likely to be ours so long as we are out of touch with
suffering humanity. He who sits with those in darkness can more
meaningfully point to freedom’s holy light.
I
am writing this from northern Alabama, where I have been in a unity
forum at the Grassy congregation, near Arab. I came earlier than the
forum and remained afterward
so
that I could be with the people, teaching and visiting among them.
While this section of our society is probably as
serene
as any, here is a brief listing of some of the problems I found in
the homes I visited.
1.
A brother in the prime of life dying of cancer. Standing by his bed
through three visits, I grew well acquainted with his desire to live,
to see his little girl grow to womanhood and to share the twilight
years with his wife. Years ago I “talked over” his little
girl who died from a fall, and since then his teenage son died in a
traffic accident. And now he is dying and knows it. The presence of
death, sickness and tragedy are baffling to him, even when he’s
too sick to be baffled.
2.
A 19-year old who is paralyzed from his neck down. He is a bright
lad, but an accident has rendered him completely helpless except to
move his head. His condition is still a new experience, so he
continues to explore the mystery of his tragedy. “It is hard to
believe as I look down at my arms and legs that I can’t move
them as I always have, but I can’t,” he said to me with
more of an air of mystery than of self-pity. “I miss such
simple things as being able to scratch my nose and rub my hand
through my hair,” he added. “People just can’t
realize what it means to be paralyzed,” he said. “If for
just one minute they could be as I am, they would see what a blessing
it is to be able to move.”
3.
A sister who has grown old, and now having recently lost her husband,
she is in the throes of loneliness that she was not prepared for, if
such people ever are. She weeps. She nurses sweet memories, aided by
pictures she has clustered around her. Her loved ones are nearby, but
her mate has gone, and it is a loneliness that she pretty well has to
bear alone.
4.
A little boy that has lost part of one foot, which affects all his
plans for the future, and which makes him different from most boys
his age.
5.
Parents who are cut off from their married son due to unfortunate
relationship they have with his wife, despite their efforts to the
contrary. Rather than gaining a daughter they have lost a son. He
never calls or writes, leaving them wounded and grieved.
All
this and much more even within the shadow of one small rural
congregation. And this area probably has fewer shadows per capita
than the larger urban communities. It is just that kind of a world.
Such problems bear down upon our own people, challenging the
intention of Jesus not only to give us life but the
abundant
life.
They
are people with problems, as we are all people with problems. We are
people with problems more than we are problem people. People become
problems, I dare say, because they are not sensitive enough toward
people with problems. They think about themselves too much or take
themselves too seriously. A chat with a kid who has lost a foot or a
youth who cannot so much as lift a finger might well change their
perspective and their priorities.
Churches
sometimes actually
contribute
to
people’s problems through an insensitivity to life’s dark
drama. A sister who is trying hard to pick up the pieces of her
shattered life makes her way to one of our assemblies only to be
brutalized from the pulpit for having more than one living husband. A
brother who finds excitement in a newly found truth is warned or
scolded for expressing himself in the presence of what is suppose to
be the family of God, his own brothers and sisters in the Lord. A
youth is confused by irresponsible remarks about the theory of
evolution or when he is subjected to a lot of nonsense talk about
“worldliness” or “being faithful to the church”
or “marrying in the Lord,” which he sees to mean
marrying
in the Church of Christ.
We
have made problem people by failing to feel deeply for people with
real problems. We are unlike Jesus on this, for he met people where
they were, allowing his love to make the big difference in their
lives. The woman taken in adultery was a problem person, but in
treating her as a person with a problem, our Lord changed her life.
It
sometimes sounds hollow to tell a person with a serious problem that
Jesus is the answer. He is not, after all, a minister of magic, and
life does not come easy, nor is it without tragedy, even to his most
devoted disciples. Even though we believe that Jesus is indeed the
answer, the
ultimate
answer,
to all of life’s reverses and even to life itself, it is a
conviction that should quietly motivate us in our service to others
rather than a motto to be mouthed in the presence of seriously
depressed people. Let Jesus as the answer begin in us, through our
love as we become his Body in this world.
I
may not be able to tell a brother that Jesus will take away his
cancer, but I can assure him that he will, for the asking, be given
the grace to bear it. And I can urge him to look for God’s will
in such tragedy, for God still loves him, maybe even more now that he
is sick. And that God in his own way will give him victory through
Jesus, and that he will turn fear into trust.
While
one senses that anything he says to a youth paralyzed for life sounds
like empty words, he can always speak tenderly of God’s love.
And even here, where life seems hardly worth living, one is to look
for God’s will. I am naive enough to believe that we help such
people when we drop by and speak of God’s love and
understanding.
An
aged sister left alone in this world has a more serious problem than
some of us realize. She may not be dying and she is not paralyzed,
but her heart aches with grief and loneliness bears down upon her as
if it were a dark, rocky mountain. We need to assure her of our love
and understanding, and to help her see that with the indwelling Holy
Guest in her heart she is never really alone. And that Jesus will
eventually lift the burden of grief, and that in it all he will
minister to her and make her more beautiful and loving because of it.
A
boy with a bad foot can be shown the many opportunities that one has
despite such a handicap, with a reference to those heroes who have
been wonderfully used of God with even greater handicaps. He might
not become a tennis champion, but he might one day win the Nobel
prize in chemistry. Or he might be an obscure teacher in a ghetto
school. Whatever direction, it can be God’s way for him, with
Jesus providing the resources of strength.
Few of us are able to understand the grief of parents who have lost a son who yet lives. They will tell you that it is worse than death. Practical advice, such as suggesting that they sit tight and let him take the initiative, is easy to give. Such problems are often like volcanoes in that what appears on the surface is but a small part of what is wrong. To pray and to wait upon the Lord is a good scriptural answer, but those of us who love and minister to such ones must realize that this calls for a resignation to God’s will that few of us have. This may be part of the answer to such cruel experiences. While God certainly does not bring these things upon us, being both too good and too wise, he may well use them to minister to us and to make us what he wants us to be. There is another world, you know, for which we must be disciplined and cultivated. —the Editor